The Wonders Of Comic-Con

It was right around the time when the yeti slammed down his copy of Twilight: Eclipse and stormed out of the room that I realized it had been a bit of an unusual week.
As odd as that scene may seem to most of you, I assure you that it was just one of the many fantastic sights from this year’s annual gathering of nerds, known far and wide as San Diego Comic-Con 2010.
Last year was my first time going to The Con, so I had no idea what to expect. This year was interesting because I knew what it would be like, but I still was not fully prepared for the grandeur and sheer size of the massive event.
I went in more prepared. I had my list of panels I wanted to see. I scoped out the floor on Wednesday night (I get to go on the preview night because I’m a member of the media—and also because I’m quite awesome) to get the lay of the land and feel out the booths that would be best to visit again and again for all kinds of swag.
But I still missed out on a lot of stuff. People who weren’t even there asked me afterwards, “Did you see Angelina Jolie?” or “Did you find out if Mark Ruffalo was confirmed as the new Hulk?” or “Did you get stabbed in the eye with a pen by a kid wearing a Harry Potter shirt?” (which actually happened to someone, by the way). I saw a lot of stuff, but I still came away feeling like I missed a lot as well. I suppose that’s part of the genius of The Con; even after an intense week of nerdery, you still walk away wanting more.
But getting back to the things I did experience, it wasn’t quite as awe-inspiring for me as it was last year. I guess I’ll never really recapture that childlike wonderment that comes along with the maiden voyage to Comic-Con, which is a little bit sad. But there was still lots to see, and I will do my best to recount some of the amazing sights, sounds and experiences I encountered.

The bike from the upcoming Tron movie:


Wednesday Night
I used a summer camp analogy to describe last year’s Comic-Con, and if you’ll forgive the duplication, I have just one more comparison to make—the first night of The Con is a lot like the first day at camp. You don’t really know your way around yet, the kids who got their first already called the cool cabin, and nothing’s really going full swing just yet. It’s a good night to just wander the floor aimlessly, as I did for the better part of two hours, seeing what booths are giving out good stuff (that would be the Columbia Pictures booth, featuring the movie Salt, The Green Hornet and a sequel to the movie 30 Days Of Night) and what booths are going to be lame and stingy. (Seriously, G4? You only have buttons this year, and you expect us to pay for t-shirts? Not cool.)
But one of the most amusing moments for me (I’m a word nerd, so you may not find this funny at all) was on the trolley down to the convention center. The trolley driver, explaining that this was the red line special event service train, said that we could exit the trolley at one of three stops if we were attending “The Comic-Con.” I had to Tweet about that when it happened, because (as all nerds know), it’s not “The” Comic-Con, it’s just Comic-Con. So I went about calling it The Comic-Con for the rest of the week. And I considered this to be hilarious.
The rest of Wednesday night at The Comic-Con was spent watching part of a sneak-peek at the upcoming CW network series Nikita, about an assassin who is trying to… um…assassinate people.

I couldn’t really get into it at all because the characters kept just saying what they were feeling or describing what was happening. For example, a scene in which the show’s star, Nikita, is escaping from a secure location. She gets followed to an alley behind the building and caught by a member of the security team, who also (apparently) used to know this girl and/or have a relationship with her. Anyway, the dialogue was so elementary, they were actually saying things like “You know I can’t shoot you…not after all we’ve been through…” instead of, you know, letting the flashbacks we saw tell the story about how they went through things together. I’m not saying I could do it any better, but I can at least recognize when it’s not exactly Tolkien-esque. I’ll get down off my writer’s soapbox now.

Friday Night
I skipped Thursday this year, partly to save on gas money, and partly because I am married now, and I should probably pay at least a cursory amount of attention to my bride of just over two months. Love you, sweetheart!
Anyway, I went back down on Friday night, and I could immediately tell the difference between the weekend and the earlier mid-week days. It was pretty packed, and the costumes were starting to be much more numerous (and detailed). I saw some princesses (who explicitly said, “We’re not representing Disney!” to avoid any potential lawsuits):

...as well as some interesting takes on classic characters, such as Nintendo’s Mario looked a tad suspicious with his flashy suit, big hat and stylish cane:

...and some good, homemade group costumes (the cast of Pokemon, as worn by four girls who really did a great job with the costumes):
It's hard to see this girl with the camouflage on, except that it barely covers her:

I always forget about the autograph area until the end of the day, so by the time I got up there, not very many celebrities were still around. Olivia Munn was there signing copies of her book, Suck It, Wonder Woman: The Misadventures Of A Hollywood Geek, but I missed the ticket giveaway earlier that morning, so I just snapped a photo and moved along:

Not much happened Friday night, so I went home a little early and got ready for The Comic-Con’s big day.

It's Scott Wolf! From Party Of Five! AAAHHHH!!!!

Harry Potter's cloak of invisibility:

Saturday
Let me start off the story of my Comic-Con Saturday with a little shout out to the event staff—I almost missed out on the craziness of the day, but the sympathy and kind heart of one particular staff member made it possible.
Basically, I forgot my press pass when I drove down to meet the trolley to the convention center. As I mentioned, the need to save on gas money is a priority when you get married, so there was not enough fuel to get me home again, then back down to the trolley. So I embarked for the convention center, hoping that my press confirmation letter and photo ID would be enough.
The official policy of Comic-Con is that they don’t reissue press passes. To replace a lost attendee badge costs $100. I talked to four different people at three different locations, and there appeared to be nothing they could do.
Well, after talking with one of the supervisors, and assuring them that I had not sold my pass or anything like that, she took pity on me and issued me a one-day press pass for no charge. I won’t mention her name, just in case there would be any trouble she could get into, but I thanked her profusely and headed off to the exhibit hall once again.
Saturday at The Comic-Con is a new world full of bright colors, loud, random sounds and a whirlwind of activity that will turn your brain upside-down. It reminds me of the time I accidentally took too much Benadryl (and by too much, I mean I took one pill—I’m apparently a wimp when it comes to medicine) and ended up feeling loopy and unsure of spatial stimuli and tactile input for an entire evening.
But instead of feeling out of it, the excitement of the exhibition floor gets you pumped up for a day of costumes, celebrities and… well, waiting in line for upwards of two hours just to see something worth seeing. Woo hoo!

Batman gets interviewed...because he's always so available, after all:

Yes, there was some Twilight gear there.

At least it didn't ruin Comic-Con this year, like it did last year, apparently.

Celebrities were everywhere, from Chris Evans and Hugo Weaving (from the new Captain America movie) at the Marvel booth...

...to Michael Chiklis (who played The Thing in the Fantastic Four movies)...

to Seth MacFarlane (creator of Family Guy and The Cleveland Show)...
No, I didn’t see Angelina Jolie, or Will Ferrell, or Chevy Chase. Oh wait, I did see Chevy Chase.

And I totally nodded my head in his general direction as he walked by. We’re pretty much best friends now.
The costumes were amazing, from (my personal favorite) Colonel Sanders...

...to Gandalf...

to Voltron...
...to whatever this is...

...and that’s before the Masquerade even began. But we’ll get to that in a bit.
I had to go to the Attack Of The Show (AOTS) panel, mostly because it’s a hilarious show on G4 that shows the latest internet video sensations, gadget reviews, movie news and general awesomeness. Also, the hosts, Kevin Pereira and Olivia Munn, are really funny. I pretty much stalked Miss Munn last year at The Con, even participating in the now-famous Running Of The Munns that took place when one of her autograph sessions had to be moved at the last minute. I'm sure she's used to it.
Anyway, the AOTS panel brought the goods, as it does every year, with a contest to see which nerd could best imitate the now-famous “Double Rainbow” video clip that’s been circling the Web. They also had a bingo contest regarding the things that would happen during the panel. Some of the possible goings-on included “Sexy Yeti Sighting,” “AOTS Batman Surprises Kevin,” and “Zombie Apocalypse.” I did not win the bingo, but whoever had “Yeti Gets Upset With The Ending To The Twilight Series” got some fabulous prizes.
I got a couple autographs...

...took a photo with Pereira...

and boogied out to see what else was happening.
Turns out they close the exhibition hall at 7 p.m., but there was still plenty to see. In my wanderings, I happened upon the line for the Masquerade, an event I missed last year. They still had tickets, so I grabbed one and wondered (with some trepidation) if I would be forced to slow dance.
To my great relief, I did not. From the comfort of my seat, I was able to watch what was essentially a fashion show combined with an improv class, all featuring some awesome costumes.
Some were marvels of engineering, like the Amp suit from the movie Avatar:

...or the entirely-homemade minotaur:

...or the crowd-favorite Puff The Magic Dragon:

Others were great because of the presentation, such as the Xavier School Musical (the X-Men cartoon characters singing and dancing, like in that series of teen song-and-dance movies that shall not be named):

and the mish-mash of time-traveling heroes that included Bill & Ted, Dr. Who, Sam Beckett and Ziggy (from Quantum Leap) and, of course, Doc Brown and Marty McFly:

And some were just plain awesome, like the kid with the War Machine (from Iron Man 2) costume:

...or the Avatar vs. Avatar showdown (between the main characters from Avatar: The Last Airbender and James Cameron’s Avatar):

...or the winner of Best In Show, a group called Viva Las Villains that featured some famous comic book villains as they might appear in their own series of casinos:

The costumes were amazing, the presentation varied from uncomfortable to genuinely clever and funny, and the atmosphere was electric. Nerds love their cosplay, I suppose.
All told, it was a great week. I even had a few observations gathered over the course of The Comic-Con this year.
—There was a tremendous amount of diversity in the crowd, which shouldn’t really be a surprise in 2010, but was still noteworthy in a socially positive sense. From the black guy dressed as Batman Beyond:

...to the Asian kid dressed as “super” hero Kick-A**:

...to the Hispanic Jedi warrior I waited in line with to get a tin of red hots from the WB booth.
The world of the nerd apparently knows no boundaries, and The Comic-Con was a perfect example.
—The best swag (which stands for Stuff We All Get) came from the aforementioned Columbia Pictures booth, where they handed out three different free t-shirts, posters, buttons, and, on occasion, packages of microwave popcorn. They did it right—sometimes they weren’t handing out anything, sometimes you got a bunch of stuff. You had to check back at random times to see if you could score something cool.
The booth that was so close to getting it right was the booth for Millenium Films, featuring upcoming releases Red, Drive Angry and The Expendables. They gave out free t-shirts, but with a catch—you had to go to a different part of the exhibition hall to wait in line, and they only gave out a limited number, so the line was immediately full as soon as it opened. They gave away a lot of other stuff, including refrigerator magnets and keychains, but it mostly cluttered up my backpack and after the second day of it, nobody really wanted another cord organizer from the upcoming movie Sourcecode.
I was pretty disappointed with the G4 booth, which gave away lots of stuff last year, but insisted on selling stuff this year. They handed out buttons this year, but compared to last year’s giveaways of shirts, rub-on tattoos, photos, posters and even green plastic visors, it was just sad. Same with the WB booth, which clearly had enough foot traffic to justify some cool handouts, but only passed out little red hots in a Vampire Diaries tin, a free Harry Potter broomstick for your character on Xbox Live, some little buttons, and a card to go to another booth to get a Big Bang Theory button. For one thing, don’t make me stand in line all that time just to send me on an errand. And for another thing, come on folks, it’s The Comic-Con. This is not the time to skimp.
—As always, there was a lot I kind of saw but didn’t get to investigate. There is apparently a new Medal Of Honor video game coming out (I was a HUGE fan of the MOH series when it was on Playstation 1 & 2, when it was about World War II, but this one looks like it involves modern wars), and I didn’t really get down to the Marvel booth that often (they didn’t hand out much, and it was a little ways away from the main booths congregated in the center of the exhibition hall). I heard a lot about different panels, but you can pretty much only see one panel a day (unless you stay for back-to-back panels in the same room) because the lines get so long so quickly.
I wish I’d had a little more time to check out the autograph area as well; I did take some photos of the scattered celebrities who were left on Saturday night (including the voice cast of Futurama:

...as well as the guy who played The Soup Nazi on Seinfeld):

but I didn’t get any sweet autographs this year.
But there were a couple of random sightings that made my week, in a weird way. I checked out last year’s Comic-Con photos, and found this picture of a nerdy kid with big white shoes riding the trolley the first day:

Well, I saw him on the trolley again this year, but in a much bigger crowd, so I couldn’t get a shot of him. I saw another guy, also from last year’s trolley ride (this nerdy guy, who was thoroughly engrossed in his bag of goodies):

...on the trolley ride home on Saturday. In a weird way, it was a cool way to end my Comic-Con experience this year, as if seeing those guys brought it all around, full-circle.
And it reminded me that no matter how cool I get, or how many times I see an angry yeti storm off a stage, I’m just a big, nerdy kid inside.
Be sure to write in if you have any thoughts about Comic-Con, or if you have any photos from The Con that you'd like to share.

I'll Probably Get Acne Just From Breathing The Air

Once a year, the truly nerdly among us emerge from parental basements all across the country and begin the pilgrimage to the pinnacle of geekdom:

Comic Con.

For the 40th year, the Con has been the Mecca of all things geek, and since my eighth-grade school photo seems to be my membership card to this particular social demographic, I figured I'd see what all the craziness was all about.

For starters, the whole experience was sensory overload on so many levels. I say this as a bit of a disclaimer if my collected thoughts seem a bit jumbled, but hopefully I will effectively communicate just how literally awesome, in the truest sense of the word, this event truly is.

We'll start at the beginning, which is the best place to start, from what I understand.

Wednesday night, the special preview night for the four-day pass holders and the members of the media (like me!) to get a sneak peek at the Con before the gates are thrown back for the less-privileged masses.

Being a newbie to the Con, I did my share of research online before heading downtown. The first thing I found is that parking is a major issue, so I took the Internet's advice (which is always a good idea, I hear) and utilized the public transportation system.

The San Diego trolley covers most of the downtown area, and when Comic Con is going on, they run a special route from Qualcomm Stadium to the Gaslamp and back to help alleviate the parking problem. I figured that, since I knew how to get to the Q already, that would be the best way to go.

And did I ever make the right call. Not only was it fast and easy, but watching the people on the train just made my day. I'm something of a people-watcher anyway, but the Con always brings out the finest specimens of humanity. Before the trolley even left the station, we bore witness to a pair of young men in skin-tight black body suits, apparently dressed up as some kind of anime or video game characters. They waved to us, then had to wait in line to use the trolley pass kiosk like mere mortals, which kind of ruined the illusion they had going on.

But this didn't dampen any spirits, because the handful of us waiting at Qualcomm were soon off on our own Comic Con adventures! I wasn't sure if everybody on the train was going to the Con, but I'm pretty sure this kid was:


Not to pick on anybody, but let's just say that I'm pretty sure nobody thought he was going to a football game. I learned right then that the spirit of Comic Con is truly universal, but that this particular universe usually consists of people wearing glasses. And I wear glasses, so I should know. Again, I have to mention my eighth-grade school photo, which gives me license to pick on the nerds of the world. Sorry for the tangent; back to the story.

As we careened our way south, more and more comic enthusiasts came aboard, to the point where it was standing-room only on our particular train. It got a little scary when I looked over and saw this:


My heart skipped a beat before I realized that not only was the holster empty, but I'm pretty sure it was a girl wearing this getup. Maybe not; there are some pretty skinny nerds out there. Again, I should know. I'm not sure if he/she was dressed as a specific character, but it was either sexy or creepy, depending on the answer to the earlier question of gender. Not that we want to dive too deeply into that sticky situation. Moving on.

Before long, we pulled up outside the convention center and behold! The glory of the 2009 Comic Con was laid before us in all its majesty! I have never seen so many people downtown at the same time, even though I've been to a number of Padres games. I guess if the Padres had super powers, or at least could draw characters with super powers, they might draw this kind of a crowd. Maybe not, if they keep cutting their player payroll every season. But that's a topic for another column.

Either way, the line for the Con stretched all the way down Harbor Drive, practically to the Coronado Bridge. Well, maybe not that far, but at one point, those of us in line found ourselves walking on a patch of grass that none of us knew existed down there. To their credit, the Comic Con staff and security team were efficient, and the line was in near-constant motion. Despite the daunting size, the line moved quickly and got us inside within a few minutes, and all without any embarassing nerd violence. Well, I did see at least three Jedi knights, but thankfully their light sabres remained sheathed until we got inside. They probably just used their mind tricks to get in anyway. Those sneaky Jedis are always up to something.

All of this was for naught in my case, however, as my previously-established Con inexperience took me through a line I didn't need to join. Since I was able to secure a press pass, thanks to my sweet job at the Roadrunner, I got to go straight to the press pass line and get my badge within a few moments. I'm pretty sure that I got special treatment because I'm famous, too. It's not every day that they see the real-life author of the I Kid You Not columns in the Valley Roadrunner. I know they were trying to remain calm, but I could tell that they were all understandably impressed. I do my best to keep a low profile, but when you get to be this well-known, it's just hard to be seen as a regular person. What can you do, right? At least my eighth-grade school photo hasn't been released to the public. And just FYI, I'm probably going to mention that photo at least three or four more times... just so you're prepared.

With my press pass firmly (OK, draped daintily) around my neck and my grab bag full of things I didn't examine until I got home, I hit the floor of the convention center to finally experience Comic Con firsthand. On a personal side note, I was a little disappointed to not hear a chorus of angelic voices or a John Williams-conducted orchestra capturing the awe and solemnity of the moment as I strode confidently through those gray double doors that have been the gateway to geekdom for 40 years now. I guess that's reserved only for the members of the broadcast media. It figures.

Honestly, from that point on, my memory is a little hazy. Perhaps it was the pungent combination of nerd sweat and laminated paper that overwhelmed my nostrils, or the sheer size of the space, or even just the constant hum of activity eminating from all corners of the arena. Whatever the source, every one of my five senses was kicked into overdrive -- yes, even the sense of taste; when you have that many nerds packed in like cattle, the scents go beyond normal smell and creep down to the back of the throat where you start to taste whatever's coming off that dude wearing the XXXL Green Lantern t-shirt -- and my brain had to try to keep up. Thankfully, I've learned to always keep a pen and notepad handy in these situations, so I managed to scrawl a few scattered notes to help me remember some of the more noteworthy of the sensory experiences.

Throughout the evening, I overheard the most random, amazing, scary, and/or enlightening things. Outside the convention center, I listened in to an older Asian man talking about some of the things he's created, from various comic or cartoon statues to a life-size replica Master Cheif helmet from the original Halo video game. I'm not sure if the woman with him was his wife or his mom (I know that sounds awful, but it's more because I didn't get a good look and didn't want to stare, I promise), but I wouldn't be surprised either way. This guy could have been a millionaire, or he could have been living in his parents' basement. You just never know at the Con. I'll be sure to share more things I overheard from the rest of the weekend.

Despite my earlier attempt at a joke about diversity, there really are lots of different people at Comic Con. From the little babies in strollers to the older couples clinging to each other in the sea of moving humanity, or from the guys in suits to the kids with dyed blue mohawks, every type of person you can imagine is represented at the Con. To be fair, I did see a lot of glasses, a lot of goatees, and for some reason a lot of old-fashioned hats, which is cool I guess. I also saw this:

...which I can't really explain, other than the fact that it's a man with a flower hat on. Then there was this:


...which seemed out of place among the booths for cartoons. The typical reaction I noticed from the other fans snapping photos here was something like, "Oooh, a Playmate! Oh, 1998...that's disappointing." Poor girl, still riding that one accomplishment from nearly 11 years ago. I guess if it pays the bills, right?

Speaking of bills, I don't know how much some booths cost, but it has to be a lot. Even for some second-tier companies, the Con is a mandatory all-out situation. A few t-shirts clothespinned to the cubicle wall won't do; you've got to step your game up... like this:

...which is Castle Greyskull from the He-Man cartoons. Although the statue inside wasn't He-Man, but rather somebody called He-Ro, which is just weird and off-putting. I saw no signs of She-Ra or the green tiger, which was pretty disappointing. Nice work on the entrance though; I guess the Con is all about getting people to actually stop when they go by your booth. Well done here.

One of my favorites was the Hasbro booth, which was pimping the August release of G.I. Joe with all it had, and all but ignoring the latest Transformers movie after it got such poor reviews (which I still don't understand, but more on that another time). With actual costumes from the movie on display, I was instantly transported back to my childhood, to a time before my eighth-grade school photo existed and my world was filled with the simple joys of a few G.I. Joe figures. Some of the older figures we have include Storm Shadow and Snake Eyes, both of whom seem to figure prominently in the new movie. Their costumes look awesome, and I am pretty jealous of anyone who gets to wear them:

Storm Shadow, ninja extraordinaire, and his nemesis:

Snake Eyes, the coolest G.I. Joe in the box, no matter what else they came up with.

Some cool other sights included a Batman suit:

and the Bat bike:


...and whatever this is...not that it needs any particular reason to exist for us to enjoy it:


Everywhere I looked, Comic Con offered forth something amusing, interesting, appealing, or just plain cool for me to check out.

After cruising the booths on the ground floor for a while, I headed upstairs to the main ballroom to see the special previews of some new TV shows set to debut this fall.

I missed the first one when I was milling around trying not to bump into people and clandestinely snapping photos of cool things, but I made it in time to see almost all of the second showing, which was a full episode of a new show on ABC called V. Yes, just the letter "v." It makes sense because the show is about "visitors" from another planet who look like humans (only all of them are ridiculously good looking and wearing silver). I won't spoil anything, but if you like sci-fi stuff with a good story and just enough drama to make the wife happy, then check this show out. You may even have a good time trying to figure out where you've seen all the actors before, like I did the whole time. My favorite was seeing the guy who played Steve the Pirate in the movie Dodgeball a few years ago. No matter what he does with his hair, or what kinds of roles he plays, he will always be Steve the Pirate. And that will always make me smile.

The final showing was another full episode of an upcoming ABC series called The Vampire Diaries. I know what you're thinking, because I was thinking it too: really, more vampires? In the show's defense, at least these vampires don't sparkle in the daytime, and they seem to follow all the old standard vampire ways -- they can't come inside unless they're invited in, they don't show up in a mirror, etc.

The show itself isn't terrible, unless you really hate watching good-looking people walking around looking really good looking. It's set in and around a high school, so you're going to get a heavy dose of the old teen angst, but it's not anything more than similar shows like Smallville or anything else on the CW network. And this show has Nina Dobrev as the female lead, which makes anything watchable in this reporter's opinion. Not that you'd take my opinion seriously if you saw my eighth-grade school photo, but again, that's tucked away somewhere far, far away, which is the best thing for us all.

After the exhileration of my first night at the Con, the trolley ride back to Qualcomm was a welcome wind down, even though we got pretty well crammed in for the return trip. I felt a little bad for the regular trolley riders, who kept a wary eye on all of us with our Comic Con badges still proudly displayed throughout the journey. One courageous young lady finally asked if we were all together from something, and I told her about all the wonders and magic of Comic Con, which she'd never heard of despite living in San Diego. She was nice enough, but you could tell she wasn't much impressed by the notion of an entire convention about comic books. Either that, or she knew all about my eighth-grade school photo and just didn't want to talk to me. (We did it! That's three more times! Ah, that's good stuff.)

But, if nothing else, I guess the one thing I took away from my first night at Comic Con is that it isn't just a convention about comic books. Sure, they're a big part of what's going on, but really, the Con is about celebrating all the things that make a nerd's world go 'round, no matter what that might be.

I can't wait for day two.

I Love You, Awkward Silences

Laughing out loud is not something I do with tremendous regularity.

Not that I'm not a happy person or anything, it's just that it takes something genuinely, unexpectedly, refreshingly funny to get me to break my otherwise Victorian stoicism and let loose with an audible chuckle or two. If it's predictable, or run-of-the-mill, or in the category of "I'm pretty sure they hired a chimp to write that," then I probably won't find it humorous in the least. But keep trying, Comedy Central...I'm sure you'll find a new idea for a show that's worth watching some day. Thank goodness for Stephen Colbert and Futurama reruns in the meantime.

But after smirking my way through a series of underwhelming comedies in recent memory, I was refreshed and delighted by I Love You, Beth Cooper. For a movie that centers around a high school graduation, this movie surprised me. Usually, you expect to see a lot of toilet humor (translation: easier than clever humor, and therefore not nearly as funny) and just as much sexuality of a gratuitous nature throughout the film.

Not so with this movie. Well, not entirely -- there is a subplot about the best friend and his assumed homosexuality, and there is a shower scene -- but in comparison to most teen comedies, these are handled relatively well on the shadiness meter and really don't distract from the overall feel of the movie.

And the overall feel is the key -- somehow, director Chris Columbus (I love that his company is 1492 Pictures -- he pretty much had that one mapped out for him at birth) finds a way to give the characters a depth that is usually lacking in these kinds of movies. Amidst the hilarity and the absurdity of what's happening to these people, there exists a reality that isn't just mushy or contrived. You find yourself laughing with the characters, not at them.

At least I did. Movies like this are always personally fun for me because...well, without going into too many details, I wasn't the most popular in high school. I'm sure there are many of us out there in the world, living normal adult lives now, but looking back at our prep days and just shaking our heads.

What's great about this movie isn't that the dorky kid gets the hot cheerleader (please, like you didn't know what was going to happen), or that the hot cheerleader finds some deeper truth to life besides being popular (again...nothing spoiled there).

The great thing is that you know what it's like to be there -- to be hopelessly awkward when the girl of your dreams finally talks to you, or to be swept up in the craziness of the moment and end up driving your ex-boyfriend's Hummer into the living room of the skank he was cheating on you with, or to be forced to pretend like you're calm and collected while you're so freaked out that you're wondering if it's possible to throw up your spleen.

I Love You, Beth Cooper is full of those awkward pauses, those moments between the moments, those silent hiccups in the flow of normalcy that can take your breath away. And it sticks with you on your way out of the theater because it's so unswervingly authentic. In a word, I think I might call this movie precious -- partly in a sarcastic way that refers to the inherent cuteness of these little high school kids having all this drama and craziness, but also partly in a way that means that it's something personal, something unique that each of us experiences by way of recalling our own youthful exploits.

And just to clarify, I'm not saying that this movie is going to rewrite Shakespeare, or that it's going to win major awards. But for what it is, it's really well done and genuinely funny to boot.

Some personal notes that you may or may not find helpful:

-- The main character (Dennis) totally reminded me of my brother Nate. He looks a little (just a little) like him, and I think the striped rugby shirt added to the overall picture, but even his mannerisms were enough like my bro that it was that much funnier for me.

-- Hayden Panettiere does a great job, and not just because she's absolutely adorable. She plays Beth Cooper in a way that is alternately confident and self-conscious, which totally rings true of what I see in high school kids, especially the popular ones. Given that she's only a few years removed from high school herself probably helped. But her performance just draws you to the character and adds more and more layers of authenticity to the film. Great work.

-- The blond friend of Beth's, Treece I guess her name is (had to IMDB that one), totally reminded me of this girl I just met recently. My friend Kaitlynn totally agreed. We're not exactly sure we should tell this girl though. I'll let you know how that turns out.

-- Another great performance by Dennis Cooverman's father, played by Alan Ruck (aka Cameron from Ferris Bueller's Day Off, among many other films) as well. He added another layer of humor and novelty that most actors in that role would not have acheived. And he's just a fun actor to see anyway. We were a little disappointed that he didn't have a 1961 Ferrari 250 GT California in his garage.

-- I will go see this movie again. If you want to come with me, let me know. It will be fun.

So, long story short, go see I Love You, Beth Cooper. It's funny, it's clever, it's deep but not too deep, and if your heart isn't at least a little warmed by the end, then you just shouldn't watch movies at all.

Original Gangsters

Sneaking beer into a midnight premiere of a movie: a little crazy.

Sneaking beer bottles into a midnight premiere of a movie: definitely crazy.

Sneaking beer bottles into the midnight premiere of Public Enemies: straight gangster.

And apparently the quartet of little 16-year-olds sitting down the aisle from me are more hardcore than I am, because the four of them somehow managed to sneak in more than six bottles, which they downed before the previews were done and spent the remaining time kicking over the empties and squeezing past me to get to the bathroom. Between the booze to my left and the four homeboys to my right who apparently bathed in Axe body spray before they left the house, I couldn't even taste my popcorn by the end of the movie.

But there was a movie going on, despite the repeated bathroom breaks the drunkies to my left needed to take. And it was a pretty good movie...but not quite as good as it could have been.

The movie Public Enemies tells the story of 1930s bank robber John Dillinger. This guy was more notorious than Al Capone, but somehow came out on the other side drawing comparisons to Robin Hood. He was a suave, good-looking (relatively; a quick Google image search shows you what suave and good-looking meant in 1933), charming man who did what we all wish we could do when The Man gets us down -- he did whatever he wanted.

The real-life story of Dillinger is fantastic and compelling; the man broke his associates out of prison in Indiana, stole more than $300,000 (which is over $4 million by today's standards) in less than a year of bank robbing, attacked two state police arsenals to stock up on weapons and ammo, traveled to Florida, Texas and Arizona to stay hidden from the authorities, was arrested after a fire broke out in his hotel and he was found with stolen money and guns, escaped custody in Arizona by stealing the sheriff's car, and became the number one most wanted criminal on the FBIs list.

Public Enemies does a good job of telling the story, but I kept waiting for the movie to choose the genre path it would take. When a movie comes out about a subject like this, it usually goes in one of two directions: it can either be an action movie with lots of gunfights, snappy one-liners and a larger-than-life feel (like Goodfellas or Pulp Fiction), or it can be a dramatic movie that focuses on the details of the story, the development of the character's thoughts, emotions and relationships, and seeks to connect the audience to the main character in some way (Road To Perdition, Scarface, etc).

This movie kind of half did both things. There was good action, but it wasn't sustained enough. They showed a few of the bank robberies, including a scene with Dillinger's trademark vault over the bank teller's counter, but then another quiet, dramatic scene came in on its heels. I was waiting for one of those action-movie montages, where they would show one robbery after another with the captions of the date and place underneath and a loud soundtrack that gets you pumped up about what's happening on screen. None of these things happened, and even the music was mostly disappointing, other than one main theme featuring a distorted guitar and a banjo that they should have played a lot more. They didn't even show Dillinger's most famous robbery, in which he and his gang pretended to be filming a bank robbery scene for a movie, which drew applause from the customers and bank employees. There are some good one-liners, including my favorite from Dillinger: "Good thing he was pretty, because he sure ain't called Whiz Kid Floyd."

But on the the other side, I felt like they didn't spend enough time developing Dillinger's relationship with Billie Frechette (played by Marion Cotillard, who gets strangely more and more attractive as the movie goes on). They meet, Dillinger pursues as only Dillinger can, and they end up together. I suppose it was one of those whirlwind encounters that happen every now and then in life, but by the end, the two are so powerfully and resolutely devoted to each other that it left me wondering how they got to that point. The same happens with Dillinger's best friend and number two man, John "Red" Hamilton. To emphasize what I mean, I had to look up that character's name on IMDB.com to figure out who he was. He was Dillinger's right-hand man, and there's a scene where the two of them share what appears to be a deep connection, but the movie doesn't really develop this or show how it came to be.

Overall, I enjoyed the movie, because I enjoy almost every movie I see. It's a good story with some good action and some good genuine moments. But it turned out to be a tad disappointing because of how good it could have been.

As we were walking out, I could tell that the gangsta-wannabe kids were disappointed. They wanted to see Johnny Depp busting caps and rolling with shorties in his pimped-out gangsta ride...but instead they just saw a bunch of white guys in gray wool suits driving old Fords through the midwest. Not that we're stereotyping or anything. It's OK, they were Mexican. We're allowed to make fun of them, right?

Run, Megan, Run!

Even when you're only 12 feet away from a gigantic screen, Megan Fox is still really, really cute.

I was reminded last night that I very much dislike seeing a movie on opening night, especially when that movie is the most highly-anticipated nerd movie of the summer...or in the top three at least.

I figured that showing up 30 minutes early for the midnight showing would be plenty of time to at least have a reasonable seat. Apparently nerds have an affinity for waiting in ridiculous lines and saving seats for more than two hours, because getting there half an hour early still left me and my friend Lindsay relegated to the very front row of the sweaty, acne-riddled theater.

Even from such an inconvenient viewing angle, the movie was exactly what it was supposed to be: entertaining. I knew from the first one that the plot wasn't going to be anything special, and that the acting would be reasonable. And in these expectations I was not disappointed. But the special effects, the action sequences, and the amount of running that Sam and Mikaela had to do made for an exciting 150 minutes that I will no doubt revisit in the near future.

I hear that some viewers were down on the movie for having a weird plot, bad acting and...well, just too much stuff going on. But that's what happens with every sequel, especially if the first movie was really good. The Matrix trilogy is the best example; the first movie was so mind-bottling (it was so great, it was like my mind was trapped, like in a bottle) and excellent that they had nowhere to go but down. And down they went, with successive movies that overloaded us with weird terminology, way-too-out-there characters and a plot that seemed to be pulling crap out of thin air whenever it needed to explain something.

Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen did a little bit of this. Without ruining anything, there's a few instances where the writers seemed to be making stuff up as they went. It all kind of made sense, but it's almost as if the studio allotted the writers about 10% of the pre- and post-filming schedule and gave the other 90% to the post-production CGI team.

But even so, it's not like there were plot holes or things that were left unexplained. Well, not anything that normal people would notice, although I'm sure the nerd crowd will find a whole bunch of minuscule details to whine about on the internet. Which will clearly and finally solve the problem in the best possible way, as it always does.

My point is, this is a fun movie, and when treated as such, it's a very entertaining way to spend an evening. There are even a few truly genuine moments, including the psychologically intriguing relationship between Optimus Prime and Sam, which has the elements of a father and son, brothers in arms, and the dynamic of coming from different worlds but still finding a connection. Sam and Mikaela are also an interesting take on modern dating relationships; she's working in a garage while he goes off to college, they set up a webcam date...and they're still dealing with going back to "normal" life after getting sucked into an intergalactic war between giant transforming robots. And then they get sucked back into that same war between those same giant transforming robots, and have to deal with a relationship in the midst of all of it.

Quick side note, best line of the movie:

Sam: "You said it first."

Go see it to find out what that's all about. It's totally worth it.

I guess that's what I'm getting at; this movie isn't going to take the place of Gone With The Wind or anything like that, but all the nerds in the theater last night gave it an enthusiastic round of applause as the credits rolled, and I left feeling like I would like to have a giant transforming robot with two glowing red swords for a friend. Either that or Megan Fox in those boots running around with me. Yowza.

And after all, isn't that what we all really want, deep down inside?

We Always Suspected Jack Black Was A Caveman

...although, technically, in the movie, they lived in huts...

By Dan Kidder

If I'm going to write movie reviews -- which I am -- then I should probably explain, briefly, what my movie tastes are.

For one thing, I tend to enjoy the movies I see, partly because I don't go see movies I don't think I'll like, and also because most movies today are at least enjoyable on some level. And if it's really bad, it's nice to have someone there so we can make fun of how awful it is.

With that said, I must also say that there aren't very many movies that make it into my "must see" list. Most movies fall into the "it was a good movie, but I probably won't see it again" category for me. Glad we've got that straight.

For my reviews, I'm going to break up my analysis into three parts (before, during, after) and an overall conclusion. I'll do my best not to spoil anything, but if you want to go in fresh, you don't have to keep reading.

And now, the movie "Year One," starring Jack Black and Michael Cera.

Thoughts Going In: The trailer had some funny lines, and I like Cera's delivery...he's the perfect combination of awkward and uncertain, but still saying exactly what he's thinking. I expected it to be a bit raunchy (it is a Jack Black movie) and for there to be some swing-and-miss jokes at which only the lowest-brow moviegoer would laugh. Given the hint about the tree of knowledge and all that, I also was curious to see how "offensive" it would get.

For the record, I really don't believe in getting "offended," especially not over something so trivial as a movie. This should apply to the people outside the theater when "Angels & Demons" opened up, as they held their protest signs and compared Dan Brown to the devil. It's a movie. If you don't agree with it, you don't have to go see it. And now back to the review.

Thoughts During: They didn't mess around setting up too much plot or anything, but jumped right into the funny stuff in the first scene. I was in a full theater, and people laughed...a lot. I laughed out loud at a couple of scenes; one in particular that was so ridiculous I nearly choked on my cherry slurpee. I didn't see anything overly raunchy; they did drop some choice words here and there, but most of it was innuendo, which is clearly the smarter way to go about comedy these days.

Black is funny in the most random ways, including a scene in which he starts humming along with the background music that we in the audience assumed only we could hear. Cera delivers some very quotable lines, and the supporting cast is funny enough to keep things going without overshadowing the main characters. And the outtakes during the credits...good stuff.


Thoughts After: Seeing a comedy is different than seeing an action movie because you leave with a different feeling. After seeing "300" in the theater, I left feeling like getting in a fight with the guy walking in front of me, just because I was so pumped up.

After comedies, my usual feeling is one of general amusement, but without any specific physical result. This movie did what it was supposed to; I left feeling like I just had a great time.

The plot wasn't intricate, but it wasn't supposed to be. The story made sense though, despite some intentionally-overlooked historical inaccuracies (such as, Cain and Abel clearly did not exist at the same time as Abraham and Isaac). The Biblical aspect of the movie was interesting; they definitely took some liberties with how they presented the characters, but in the end they were so satirical that they shouldn't be offensive...they were just so over the top that it would be impossible to take any of it seriously.

The comedy and the story work together very well to make a movie that makes sense but isn't going to get anybody lost. The camaraderie between Black and Cera is developed very well, and the absurdity of romance in that time is explored with amusing results. Again, the subtlety of the innuendo through most of the movie is excellent, and it makes the more overtly physical comedy that much more funny. There are some funny gross moments, but nothing that would make most of us feel uncomfortable for long.

Overall Thought: Go see it. It's funny in a clever way, and it's clean enough to see with a date...unless your date is really picky about those things. Basically, if you like Jack Black at all, you will love this movie.

There you go...the first of what I hope will be many, many successful, enlightening, well-received movie reviews. Transformers 2 comes out next weekend, so be sure to check back then to see what I think.